Quote: Other people’s projections, are my projections about other people’s projections.
For myself, there are 3 small shifts, that create 1 big shift that alters how I show up in the world. I asked for some feedback on Facebook, asking 3 questions that seem to get in the way of these shifts. I got many beautiful responses.
Here are the 3 tiny shifts…
- Shift 1: Mindset, Self Value/Worth
- Shift 2: What’s Actually Possible
- Shift 3: How Simple It Really Is
Whether in your Health, Relationships, or Business, these 3 tiny shifts will transform your life from swimming upstream, to FLOWING downstream.
Here is a summary of the questions asked, and my responses.
Q1: What seems to be the block to seeing just how valuable you are to the world?
A: Not understanding what the world needs and how I can offer value.
🐯: This is great. The issue here is we are looking outside ourselves for the answer. The solution isn’t about what other people would find helpful, or even what you think the world needs. The solution to understanding your value, is understanding what has been valuable for YOU.
The path isn’t finding something to teach others. The path is sharing what you have learned, and as you share, you learn even faster. What you learned, is what has been valuable to you. And… if it has been valuable to you, then there will be other people who also find it valuable; guaranteed. The depth of your value to offer, is the depth of growing/understanding you’ve been through, in any particular area.
Essentially, as an example, you could do a 1-year deep dive on a subject you’re passionate about, learning as much as you can. Then, after that year, what you have learned is super valuable to other people who are passionate but haven’t started.
A: Other people’s projections.
🐯: Yes, this is a big one… If, you want other people to give you permission to be you. What helps me so much in this shift is deeply seeing that other people don’t see me. If I share my jazz music with someone who dislikes jazz music, should I stop playing jazz music? The person who dislikes jazz music, doesn’t see what I’m creating, rather, they see their dislike for something; they see themselves.
If I’m looking for permission to enjoy what I enjoy, from those who don’t enjoy what I enjoy, then I will forever be lost and disconnected from what I enjoy. This also means I’ll separate myself from the opportunity to grow more deeply into what I enjoy.
Maybe more honestly, if I was struggling with this, I would look to see how I’m using other people’s projections as an excuse for me to keep hiding.
Remember: Other people’s projections, are my projections about other people’s projections. So, regardless, of what their projections might be, still… I’m the one giving their projections meaning; which it means, what I’m experiencing… is my projection about their projections. What I think is their projection, is really my own.
A: Feeling like I’m not really being heard.
🐯: Well, a few things here.
If you want to be heard, you’ll look for the ways you’re not being heard. In some regards, I recommend stopping wanting to be heard and focusing more on your ability to communicate. Drop the assumptions that you should be heard, or you deserve to be heard. Being heard comes down to 2 things.
- Your ability to communicate, effectively.
- You are talking to the wrong person.
Effective communication is crucial for ensuring that your value is heard. Many difficulties in relationships, business, and self-understanding arise from poor communication and blaming others for our lack of skill. This is like blaming a piano for not being able to play it. If you want to be heard, learn to communicate better and stop blaming others for not listening to you.
The second point is about the audience. If you talk about a great recipe for rib-eye steak to a vegan, it might seem like you are not being heard. This is because you are talking to the wrong audience.
